Why do men prize virgins

My own mother and father, who fed me Complan every morning and Chyawanprash every evening and enrolled me in Brilliant Tutorials at the age of seven, never so much as dropped a hint that male virginity might be an asset worth preserving. And I wanted to unburden myself of it at the first opportunity.

The first opportunity, in my case, was a girl named Sim no, her parents were not service providers; Sim was an affectionate circumcision of her full name, like Sam was for Sampath. Sim and I had been going steady for 47 days when I first broached the subject of her playing an active role in separating me from my virginity.

While she was sympathetic to my cause, there was a complication: she could not help me without endangering her own virginity in the process. Unlike me, she was a girl, see? While I wanted to bury my virginity alive, she wanted to grow hers into a chaste and sublime lushness.

That is the power of ideology; the ideology of patriarchy, which bombards every man and every woman every day of their waking lives with the lie that male virginity has no value — socially or economically or emotionally or psychologically or philosophically or gynaecologically. The biggest stage where this lie is played out is the Indian matrimonial market, where the hymen is still one of the most valued parts of the bride-to-be, if not the jewels in her anatomical crown.

On the other hand, a groom who has never once taken a tour of female genitalia commands no premium over another who has. So how do we resolve this gross undervaluation of male virginity? There is only one way: apply the law of supply and demand. Reduce the supply of male virgins, and demand will go up. Once the demand rises, the price will shoot up. Others say there's just too much hype around virginity.

Martha Kempner, vice president for information and communications for the nonprofit Sexuality Information and Education Council of the U. A recent study in the journal Pediatrics showed that religious teens who take virginity pledges are as likely to have sex before marriage as their religious peers, and less likely to use condoms or birth control when they become sexually active.

Many people say losing one's virginity has different implications for men than women. While young women see the act as a symbolic giving of themselves, young men are more prone to want to get it over with and brag about it.

Similarly, says Kempner, women are taught to keep themselves "pure" and help men exercise control, while there's a "boys will be boys" attitude around men. She views Dylan's auction as a publicity stunt and doesn't anticipate she'll "continue in the industry. The importance of a woman's virginity may vary in different cultures, but generally there's not the high value there used to be, Ray said. How do Dylan's friends and family feel?

Dylan, who said she was raised in a conservative, non-Christian religious household, said although her mother doesn't agree with her, she still loves her as a daughter. Generally people have been supportive, Dylan said.

Honestly, even if I didn't do this, I'd always be the girl who thinks prostitution is OK," she said. Share this on:. Health Library MayoClinic. E-mail to a friend. Mixx Facebook Twitter Digg del. And I do believe the kind of people that find bidding on a virgin alluring fit into that category," said Boodram.

Schecter said that if she had to guess why the idea is still around is because of the culture men grow up in. Like what are they thinking, what do they think they're doing, what do they think they're taking? They must think they're taking something if they're going to pay that much money to do this.

On the website auctioning off her virginity it states that Stone "has the one thing that every man in the world wants—and that's her virginity, and it's that priceless female commodity that this brave and selfless girl is putting up on the auction block to rescue her family from ruin and destitution.

The men who are advocating for other men to sleep with virgins are, obviously, a little hard to find. But on some of the less fun websites on the internet you can find it if you are so inclined. The majority of pro-virgins are focused on finding one and making her their wife, which is a little different than virginity auctions. The latter is more about being someone's first sexual encounter—but Boodram says the underlying drive is the same.

It continues to be something we seek even though it's completely stupid. Schecter agrees, saying that the whole notion of virginity is a complete crock. Virginity is something that is defined by the person, not by a particular sexual act, or else there would be a wide array of sexually active people considered virgins.

Why is that her most precious gift?